Changes in my sister’s ways of thinking

Today, my dad found the remains of my sister’s missing toy. It was an action figure – Counselor Deanna Troi – who is my sister’s second most common alter ego, and her second most common security blanket. (Her first alter ego predates Deanna by several years, and is named for Lily’s first long-term physical therapist. Her first security blanket is her Medic-Alert necklace.)

What’s weird is that my dad and I immediately moved into a headspace of thinking that we need to buy a new Deanna as quickly as possible. (I hadn’t realized it, but apparently she’s gone through many/most of the ones I’ve bought for her over the years.) I’m not sure Lily feels entirely the same way…

Lily has added a new character to her life: “Mary.” Mary represents Mary Travers, of Peter, Paul, and Mary fame. Lily doesn’t know it, but Ms. Travers passed away a few years ago. I’ve been really off-put by this new element of my sister’s life, and I’m not sure why. It may be because Mary became prominent in our conversations around the time we lost our grandmother, and it just feels incredibly odd to hold that knowledge and know that my sister doesn’t know and/or understand.

Anyways, Mary is a slightly different character for Lily. (That’s why I’m not calling her an alter ego.) Instead of being Mary, Lily treats her as, well, as an imaginary friend, I guess. She’ll tell my mom that she wants to eat dinner with Mary, or ask us to cheer for Mary. I’m not sure what this means, if anything, but it’s really interesting to me that there’s this shift.

Maybe this is a new stage of her growing up.

It is a small comfort to me that my mom says that Lily still loves Deanna and asks for her.


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